Thank you!

Needless to say, Ferrari has been doing pretty well lately. It has a solid lineup consisting of four distinct models, it’s racing program is still winning races, it’s finally using turbocharged engines, and it’s doing a great job at keeping the naturally aspirated V-12 alive. But that’s not to say there isn’t room for improvement. For starters, I think that Maranello’s designs aren’t as exciting as they used to be. But this is another story for another time. My main rant with Ferrari is the way it’s been naming its cars.

Granted, Ferrari was never very creative with car names, having used numerals based on displacement and number of cylinders almost exclusively. On the other hand, it’s responsible for the iconic "GTO" badge, as well as names like Daytona and California, both pretty cool in my opinion. In the 1990s, Maranello began using actual words alongside numerals, coming up with badges such as Scuderia and Italia. Not very inspiring, but not bad either. The Ferrari Enzo, on the other hand, was a great tribute to the company’s founder, Enzo Ferrari.

But in 2013 Ferrari launched the successor to the Enzo and thought it’s a good idea to name it the LaFerrari. Maranello explained that LaFerrari means "The Ferrari" or the "Definitive Ferrari" and also said something about fashion and accessories, something I don’t really care about.

While I do understand Ferrari’s decision to highlight the LaFerrari as its greatest supercar, I think that the name is plain childish. For one simple reason. The LaFerrari will be almost obsolete in a few years when Ferrari will launch a supercar with 1,000-horsepower or something. Then what, Ferrari? Will you name it the LaBigKahuna? And besides, can you imagine what silly badges we could have if all automakers would start to behave like this?

Moving on...

After a short break, Ferrari decided that its existing cars also need a new name with their mid-cycle updates. This is how the FF became the GTC4Lusso. While this name isn’t half bad, Ferrari took the silly road once again by renaming the F12berlinetta into the 812 Superfast. There’s nothing wrong with 812, which stands for 800 PS (789 horsepower) and 12 cylinders, but Superfast? Have I been living under a rock and Ferrari is now owned by toy manufacturer Matchbox? I get it, the 812 Superfast is indeed impressively fast, but someone at Ferrari is also incredibly childish. Or is it superchildish nowadays?

I don’t know what the guy in charge of vehicle names has been drinking recently, but I sure hope it doesn’t spread to other brands. I hate to see other companies name their cars so that they can sell more t-shirts and smartphone covers to hipsters.

Anyway, I’d like to actually thank Ferrari for making the Prius and Huayra names seem a bit more tolerable.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to drive my LeChevy to the grocery store. I only hope that the guy who double parked his TheFord finally drove away.

What do you think?
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