If you confuse an ATM drive-thru for Taco Bell, you’re gonna have a bad time...

Look, we’ve all been there. It can happen without warning. Maybe you’re coming home late after a night at the bars, or maybe you’re just sitting around socializing with friends, or possibly you’re camped out on the couch enjoying some video games, when bam – the munchies strike. But this is no ordinary hunger. This is the sort of craving that can only be satisfied by the greasy all-American institution of fast food. Totally understandable, right? Unfortunately for one 28-year-old Florida man, the lust for delicious mass-produced meals ended up costing him a bit more than the anticipated $3.19 advertised price for a Burrito Supreme.

You see, rather than enlisting the help of a sober buddy or a ride-hailing service, the man in question allegedly decided to climb behind the wheel and set out in search of culinary satisfaction while under the influence of powerful narcotics. The hunt landed him somewhere a bit unexpected – the parking lot of a local Bank of America. According to an official police document published by The Smoking Gun, the Hernando County Sheriff was called to investigate a suspected impaired driver. The document states that the bank manager “advised there was a white male operating a blue Hyundai sedan to be unconscious in the bank’s drive-thru lane.” The manager then stated he “made contact with the driver after beating on the window for ’some time’ before the driver later woke up. Upon waking up, the driver asked [the bank manager] for a burrito before driving away after being informed he was not at Taco Bell.”

When police arrived, they found the defendant parked with the engine still running. Upon speaking with him, the police observed “delayed reaction to questions as well as slowed movements of his extremities.” The driver also made several statements that were “differing from reality such as having his air conditioning running in the car when the heat was on while the temperature outside was in the mid-40s.” Police then performed a field sobriety test and eventually arrested the driver, confiscating “a quantity of Oxycodone and Alprazolam (Xanax) found on the defendant’s person for which he has a prescription.”

Next time, just get delivery.

Man Charged With DUI After Ordering Burrito At Bank
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Source: The Smoking Gun

Jonathan Lopez
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