It’s good to be the king!

When you’ve been around as long as I have, you realize that cinematography is going downhill. Yes, I know, new movies have a ton of cool special effects and CGI is getting better and better, but movies have been lacking substance for decades now. The fingers on my two hands are enough to count the great movies I’ve seen in recent decades. The rest of them... well, the same cliches and expensive struggles to make up for the lack of originality with fancy special effects and computer-generated imagery. This might piss you off, but all those superhero movies, the James Bond franchise, and the latest sci-fi stuff suck. Things get worse in the comedy business. I can’t say I laughed too much during 2017’s best-rated comedy films. Mel Brooks and John Cleese may still be alive as of 2017, but comedy screenwriting is as dead and stiff as a doorknob.

Oh, you’re probably wondering what’s with all the movie hate in a Chevrolet Corvette article. Well, it’s all Chevy’s fault. Don’t know if you noticed this, but its press release for the Corvette ZR1 end with the phrase "it’s good to be the king!" As in the new ZR1 is the king of the Corvette reign. Or maybe even the king of the sports car business. That’s cool for marketing, but what you might not know is that the phrase is taken word by word from "History of the World," an anthology comedy film written, produced, and directed by Mel Brooks. It was launched in 1981, and it became a classic. And, in case you haven’t seen it yet, which is very likely if you think the "American Pie" series is funny, the "it’s good to be the king" phrase is used in its final sketch, "The French Revolution," by King Louis of France, played by Mel Brooks.

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Corvette with a mustache

The king is depicted as a pervert. A smug person that’s only interested in his own well-being. He’s playing chess with real people on a huge board in the yard and makes up his own rules to win games. He gropes women living in and around his castle and requests sexual pleasures to fulfill his duty as king. Oh, and he has a tiny mustache, a mole on his right cheek, and a wig. And like any king out there, he wears a golden crown. Here, have a look at some highlights from the said scene.

Granted, the Corvette ZR1 doesn’t come with a mustache or a mole, but it comes with a bad attitude.

It will grope pretty Japanese sports car on the race track before leaving them behind in a trail of smoke. And it’ll yell "it’s good to be the king" as it crosses the finish line. Giving a crap about others would be the last thing on its mind. It’s the king of the Corvette dominion and a solid candidate to rule the sports car market. And that’s what kings do. They are smug, vain, and arrogant. And needless to say, the Corvette ZR1 is definitely a pervert by way of exterior design, drivetrain, and performance.

Okay okay, I might like Mel Brooks’ work a tad too much but there’s must be a reason why Chevy ended its press release the way it did. Either the person who wrote it is also a "History of the World" fan or Chevy is trying to prepare the competition for what’s coming when the ZR1 hits the streets and the race tracks. Fear the mustache! And supercharged V-8 engines!

References

Chevrolet Corvette

2019 Chevrolet Corvette ZR1 Exterior Wallpaper quality
- image 744530
Exclusive LT5, Supercharged, V-8 Engine
755 HP @ 6,300 rpm and 715 lb-ft @ 4,400 rpm

Read our full review on the 2019 Chevrolet Corvette ZR1.

Pops' Rants: Cadillac Sucks, Ferrari Is a Hypocrite, Civic Si Gets Turbo for Nothing
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Read more Pops’ Rants news.

Hey, I’m Pops, and these people here said I need to have a bio next to a picture like everyone else. I don’t like it one bit but heck, here I am. You’re probably wondering what my real name is, huh? Well it doesn’t matter and you shouldn’t care. People call me Pops and it’s been like that for a very long time. Heck, I think I’ve been the pops of the group since I was in my early 20s. Something to do with the fact that I rant a lot and I hate pretty much everything. "Hey look, here comes Pops to bitch some more," they used to say. They used to, get my drift? What a bunch of assholes! I never bitch, I have opinions. Sure, I kind of like hearing myself talk but hey, if you don’t like it, you know where the door is. I hate it when people don’t like what I have to say but still stick around.

Pops' Rants: Cadillac Sucks, Ferrari Is a Hypocrite, Civic Si Gets Turbo for Nothing
- image 712265

Which brings me to why I’m here. You know what else I don’t like? This silly thing they now call an automotive industry. One of man’s greatest achievements has been pussified so every blockhead can drive a car while using smartphone apps, verifying his tire pressure, calling his wife, and checking whether his dog pooped on the neighbors lawn. Instrument panels have lights for every little thing that goes wrong under the hood and sends you to the dealer to change the oil. Change the oil yourself you lazy prick! Back in my day I did that in the garage, getting all sweaty and greasy. No car told me what to do and where to go. Buttons, swipes, screens, voice activation, I’m just sick of them. Wasting time and money on silly things instead of simply enjoying driving. I still do that you know. In my 1970 Plymouth Roadrunner. But not you. No, you’re too busy getting the latest apps. Ah screw it, you’re not gonna get it anyway. And I’m tired of this bio thing...

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