PSA: No 911R were injured in the attempt

Crimes never pays. Okay, well sometimes it does if you’re really good at it, but most people aren’t. Such is the case with three men that attempted (and failed miserably, I might add) to steal the safe from a Porsche dealership in Houston, Texas. In what is known as a “smash-and-grab,” three men drove their pickup into the Porsche dealership, wrapped a 50-foot chain around the safe, then attempted to pull a Fast-5 move and drag the safe from the building. It might have worked, but the bumper of the Silverado used go stuck on the door frame, leaving the would-be thieves no choice but to leave on foot. Not only did they fail miserably, but they lost their vehicle and was apparently caught on camera. We couldn’t make this stuff up. Oh, and the damages – those are pretty extreme considering the damaged cars in the showroom. Keep reading to find out and see some photos from the failed burglary.

$210,000 Porsche 911 Destroyed

So, not only did the thieves failed to get the safe they wanted oh so badly, these idiots lost their truck too. But, that’s not the half of it. It’s estimated that the building sustained at least $50,000 in damage, while the real tear-jerker comes from the cars that were damaged in the process – one of which was a $210,000 Porsche 911 Turbo. As you can see from the images, they used a pretty gnarly chain, but what should have been on their minds was whether or not their truck had the balls to pull off the heist. Guess they should have gone with something better than.. what is that? An early-to-mid-2000s Chevy Silverado?

The worst part is, the General Manager, Michael Denney, has said there isn’t even much of value inside the store outside of the cars.: “It’s unfortunate; there’s just nothing, we don’t leave anything around, maybe you could grab a couple of shirts, those have tags on them too. There’s nothing in here that’s sitting around, that’s worth tearing a whole dealership to get to.”

And there you have it, folks. Probably the dumbest thing you’ll hear about all week. What do you think? Did these guys watch Fast 5 one too many times or are they just desperate for money around the holidays? Let us know what you think in the comments section below.


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2017 Porsche 911 Turbo High Resolution Exterior
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Source: click2houston

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